Why nicknames?

I don't normally tend to be a very private person. I don't know that I chose to be open and transparent as much as I just inherited it…it's hard to be private when your face and emotions show every extreme. (emotionally gifted, remember?)

So when I first considered starting a blog, being anonymous wasn't really my plan.

But then I talked to my husband about it, and plans changed.

His job requires pretty thick skin. He gets a lot of grief for decisions he makes, and some people just aren't the least bit concerned with how they present their opinions to him. Or to his administration. Or to the school board.

Well, I guess they might be the "least bit concerned," since quite a few of the complaints in the last couple of years have been sent anonymously.

I am refraining here from going into a long rant about cowardly people who choose to add lies and twist their versions of the truth in order to cause trouble for people…and to do it without adding their names so that no one can actually have a meaningful conversation about their complaints. I'm not going to pretend that my husband is perfect (HA!) and never makes any mistakes or bad choices in his job. He wouldn't claim that, either. But I've never seen him unwilling to discuss – even at great length with upset parents – any decision he's made that someone came to talk with him about. So you can imagine how frustrating it is to have unknown people say things (especially untrue things) in a way that makes it impossible to respond or have meaningful conversation.

(And yes, I do see the irony of making that statement from my we-shall-remain-nameless blog.  Ahem.)

Which leads me back to this blog. The first concern was that – if I was going to have an open blog using our names – someone searching for ammunition information to use against my husband might find any number of things on here to work from. Not that it's my intention to put things out there that could be harmful to him, but it has been my experience that it didn't take much information before, and someone (some "ones?") have gotten plenty of mileage out of the small amount that is already out there. And I just don't have it in me to think through all the implications of what I write, and what could be made out of what I write. (For example, I probably would have had to leave out my moment of gloating about our win the other night!) If I have to over think and second-guess everything I post, I'll never post anything.

An even greater concern was the thought that someone wanting to be really hateful might use this blog to attack me, or our kids, as a way to get at my husband. That thought nearly shut me down before I even started. I'd like to think that people wouldn't do that, but the truth is that it only takes one person.

And just to clarify: we are not under attack here. My husband is a good (great!?!) coach who has a TON of support in this community, from parents, fans, and administration. He has, however, had a handful (or maybe just one…who knows?) of unhappy people who have chosen to express their unhappiness in unfair and unkind ways…which has made us super cautious.

I know some people are bothered by blogs like this that are vague and anonymous. I hope that those of you who are reading because you are friends and family will be tolerant of the nicknames! And for those of you who may have stumbled across this and are following along on our adventure, I thought it might be helpful to know my reasoning for being cautious.

But if you catch me saying something that you don't think I should have said, or don't think I would have said if my real name had been on it…tell me!

Oh, and if you've got a good suggestion for a nickname for my husband, I'm open to ideas. I just can't bring myself to call him "the Coach." But that's a story for another day.

Or maybe not!